Read Textual Sermon from Sarah Jakes Roberts
The Desire to Be Understood
Part of my defensiveness really comes from my desire to be understood, right?
I think at the end of the day, I am defending the idea that you don't understand me. It's not about whether or not what I did was right or wrong—it could have been wrong—but I want to feel like you understand why I made the choice that I made.
Because I feel like if you understood, then maybe you wouldn't be so angry, or maybe you would be more compassionate. I want to be understood.
The only issue with wanting to be understood is that it often keeps you from having connection. Because it's difficult to connect with someone who is so guarded and so defensive.
And I am beginning to believe that defensiveness is one of the symptoms of feeling like you are the only one—the only one who understands exactly what you're up against, the only one in your family who has any idea that this generational curse exists but also needs to be broken.
I heard my sister Armani talking about, “How do I go back home into my family when I know I have to break this generational curse?” And what I hear her saying is, “How do I prepare my defense against the world that I’m going back into?”
If we’re honest, some of us are already thinking to ourselves, “How do I prepare my defense?” I’m going back into a situation defensive because I don’t want anything to be stolen from me.
And that’s how you know that you aren’t really sure that it stuck. Because if you were really sure that what you experienced stuck, then you would know that no one could take it from you.
When we hear in Scripture things like:
“This joy that I have, the world didn’t give it, and the world can’t take it away.”
It’s because the joy that I have doesn’t have anything to do with the world around me, so they can’t even access it.
From Defense to Offense
I want to talk to somebody who wants to do more than just have a conference where I go back and have to protect it—but quite literally experience transformation.
If you experience transformation, then nobody can take what you have. Oh, I feel like that is for somebody.
I don’t want you to go back assuming a posture of defense when God has called you to move into a position of offense. You’ve got some points to make, baby. You’ve got some goals to make, baby. And you can’t do that if you feel like you’re defending.
I hear God saying that it is okay for you to be on the front line—that I will be your shield, that I will be your deflector.
“No weapon that is formed against thee shall prosper; and every tongue that shall rise against thee in judgment thou shalt condemn.” — Isaiah 54:17 (KJV)
I don’t have to be defensive when I know that my God is defending me. I don’t have to look out for myself when I know that God has my back.
What happened in this room was real—no one can take it away from me. And so when I step into my identity, I’m not going into it like a little girl who can be robbed or have something taken away from her. I’m going into it as a grown woman—a grown woman who had an encounter that will never change me again.
The Only One
I love this text because Lazarus, at this point in the text, is the only one in his circle who has experienced death and resurrection.
It would have made sense to me if Jesus resurrected him to then just say, “Stick with Me. Stay close to the power that resurrected you because no one in your family is going to get you now.”
But Jesus resurrects Lazarus and then leaves him back in the family where he is the only one.
Somebody in this room—you’ve been resurrected. You felt connection, you felt friendship, you felt sisterhood. But we all know that at the end of the day, we’re going back into our worlds where we can often feel like, “I’m the only one. The only one raising this child, the only one in this apartment by myself, the only one figuring out what confidence looks like for me.”
I wanted to study this because it shows me that when you experience transformation, it does not automatically mean that you have company. God doesn’t mind transforming you and sending you back into an environment where you are the only one.
Why is that? Because God trusts what happened down on the inside of you. God trusts the power that is down on the inside of you.
I hear God saying, “If you stayed in an environment of power, it would give you an excuse not to unleash what I put down on the inside of you.” But I’m sending you back into a city, back into a family that needs the power you’ve been exposed to.
This was not just playtime—it was preparation for game time.
Transformation and Purpose
When Jesus resurrects Lazarus, He leaves him—but later, He visits Bethany and sits at the table with Lazarus.
I imagine that being Lazarus in that moment must have been comforting, because he was finally close to someone who understood what it’s like to have the kind of power work through you that brings you back to life.
Part of the reason I wanted to name our chat together “Not for Long” is because when Lazarus passes the test of being the only one, Jesus comes back.
This time, Jesus doesn’t have to resurrect Lazarus again. This time, He can break bread with Lazarus.
Because Lazarus doesn’t need Jesus in the same way he needed Him before.
This breakthrough that you experienced in this place—you’re never going to need that power in the same way again. This was not just a conference for somebody; this was a graduation to the next dimension.
“He which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ.” — Philippians 1:6 (KJV)
Does anybody want Jesus to break something off of them that they never have to experience again?
Spirit of fear, I rebuke you! I rebuke every lie in this room that would make you believe that it’s just temporary.
“For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.” — 2 Timothy 1:7 (KJV)
Not for Long
When Lazarus is sitting there with Jesus, he is reminded that he’s no longer alone. Because God’s never going to let you be alone for long. God will send someone who understands the power working inside of you.
The women in this room are not just ordinary women—they are reminders that you are not going to be the only one for long.
Because God is raising up women everywhere to take their places at His table.
And Lazarus and Jesus, now that they have shared in this moment, both have targets on their backs. Lazarus wasn’t being hunted down until he experienced the power of God.
Who would I be if I didn’t prepare you for the fact that transformation puts a target on your back? It makes you stand out, and it makes you an enemy to the enemy.
But I am reminded of:
“And I will put enmity between thee and the woman, and between thy seed and her seed; it shall bruise thy head, and thou shalt bruise his heel.” — Genesis 3:15 (KJV)
At the end of the day, the serpent may bruise your heel, but if you dare to produce—even with a target on your back—your obedience will crush the head of the serpent.
I may be a target, but no weapon formed against me will prosper. I may be a target, but I saw my sister survive, so I will survive too.
You are not going to be the only one for long.
God says, “I’m bringing you your tribe. I’m putting you at the table with people who understand the power inside of you.”
Because the power in you needs a space that speaks to it. And when I say, “Come forth,” what I mean is:
Come forth, power. Come forth, Holy Ghost.
Questions this sermon answers
- Why do we often feel defensive when seeking to be understood?
- How does defensiveness block genuine connection?
- What does it mean to move from defense to offense spiritually?
- Why does transformation sometimes lead to isolation?
- What can we learn from Lazarus about being “the only one”?
- How does transformation place a spiritual target on our backs?
- What is God’s promise when we stand firm in our purpose?
